Passive aggression can seed nasty arguments and fights between people. You can support yourself and help avoid passive aggressive exchanges with those you love by clearly, kindly and respectfully asking for what you need and want.
Over the holidays it can be tempting to spend lots of time with other people. Often, the amount of time we spend together can be overwhelming. Support yourself this year by finding tranquil spaces when you want to settle or calm down.
One of the best things you can give your loved ones is your time and your full attention. Most people feel better about themselves and more important when they are paid attention to and when that person is someone they love or admire.
Understanding yourself better and developing personally is one helpful way to support yourself in an intimate relationship. It is ideal if your partner does this as well. When each person has a deep understanding of oneself, the relationship can flourish.
How do you ask for what you need or would like in your relationships? Do you ask with kindness and clarity, or do you ask with frustration that you had to ask? Or not at all? It's much easier for the other to respond when you ask clearly and nicely.
When you have that exchange with your partner that might be heated, tense or lead to an argument, try to first imagine your partner as your friend and the person you love. Your partner will sense your care, feel safe and will listen more.
Each group we know, participate in or belong to-whether established or impromptu-has it's own unique set of relational dynamics, created by people in the group. Each group weaves its own personal tapestry as threads of contact interlace.
If your partner brings up something that he or she feels unhappy about, it's not the best time for you to add on with what you are unhappy about. Try listening attentively until your partner feels satisfied that he or she has been heard.
It's normal to have doubts about your partner and where your relationship may take you. It's a sign that you care about your future. Try using any doubt to seed exploration with your partner. A promising partner will also be interested.
Saying to your partner what you dislike, what annoys you or what you need on a regular basis can help keep unresolved issues and feelings from accumulating. It's easier to deal with small issues rather than several big ones all at once.
The Relationship Toolkit Series is focused on promoting healthy relationship dynamics for people. All material is authored by Cori Lambert unless explicitly stated otherwise. Authentic Consulting and Counselling is located in West Perth, Greater Perth Area.